They finally sleep through the night, and I’m wide awake

Once upon a time I had a baby who liked to sleep with me and when I put a mattress on the floor where his crib was he started sleeping through the night at around age 1.

Once upon a time I had another baby who refused to sleep without me and didn’t sleep through the night with or without me for 4 and a half years. Now she sleeps through the night every time I tuck her in.

It took me months to try and get back onto a normal sleep schedule.

I still don’t have a normal sleep schedule.

By 7:30 pm I am so tired I don’t want to be up. I don’t want to talk or play with children. I don’t want to have important conversations. I want to lie down with a book or a stupid sitcom and go to sleep when my eyes give out.

This often happens by about 8:30, sometimes 9 pm.

I try to stay up longer. I really do. I want to enjoy the spring warmth and sit back and relax. I want to have adult time with DH and not be asleep like a kid when the sun is still setting.

On one hand, sleep is good. My naturopath doctor says get sleep when you’re tired. So I do. But I feel like I miss out on life.

On the other hand, I now wake up at 3ish or 4ish am and cannot for the life of me get  back to sleep.

My life begins at 4 am.

By 6:30 am I am tired and want to go to sleep and if I don’t get coffee immediately then the entire household falls apart and everyone will be late.

I manage till mid-afternoon. By mid-afternoon I want to have a nap. Only I can’t nap because I have a chatty 5 year old who wants to play and talk and go to the park…

By the time dinner is done and the late afternoon/early evening activities are over I’m ready for bed.

And the cycle begins anew.

Sleep will remain an issue for me despite the fact that I no longer have any babies around.

This weekend we’re spending an evening with another couple. Dinner reservations were made for 7:30 pm. Perhaps I can start my cycle of going to bed a bit later this weekend. I sure would like to spend the summer evenings out of doors, rather than in bed zonked out like a zombie.

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One thought on “They finally sleep through the night, and I’m wide awake

  1. I hear you!! I’m up just after 5am to get ready for work, and drag the little ones off to their dayhome, then work, pick up kids, dinner, backpacks, lunches, organize for the next morning and by the time they’re in bed by 8pm (if I’m lucky) I collapse on the bed. I have no idea how some people have energy to do yoga or sew clothes from scratch in the evening, let alone anything!!

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