Those kids make me laugh…

…and cry…but I’m trying to focus on the funny stuff these days.

I”ve been kind of distracted lately. I have been working…well, sort of. Been working on a proposal to submit so I can get officially hired.

Imagine, Javamom might end up being a photographer of…ducts. And pipes. And wearing a hard hat and safety boots while taking pictures of ducts and pipes…

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

* * *

The other day I was going to pick up Benjamin at a friend’s house 5 blocks over. Sonja came with me, all proud to go visit Benjamin’s friend (who also has a toddler sister which as far as she was concerned was bonus).

As we were walking along the neighbourhood streets I tried to distract her incessant chatter by pointing out the beautiful coloured leaves on the trees. It was the most perfect afternoon. The sun was out, the temperatures were spring-like, and the colours above were intoxicating.

But that little SonjaBee just wouldn’t stop talking:

HerWhere is his house?

Me: It on Eighteenth Street.

HerWhere is Eighteenth Street?

Me:  It’s that way.

HerBut how do we get to Eighteenth Street?

Me:  We will walk along the bottom.

HerBut where IS the bottom?

I just had to laugh. She’s such a cutie in her quirky little way…

* * *

Benjamin too has these little sayings he comes up with. I don’t know if he misunderstands, mishears, or just mis-processes things when he hears about them.

He is usually a very attentive guy and likes order, and clear instructions. When asked to explain something he’s heard or learned somewhere, he’s usually not far from the proper definition of whatever the topic of conversation is.

But the other night I laughed at his misinterpretation. We were in my bed calming down from a busy weekend, and he had brought along his Lego Minifigures sticker book.

One page in this book was about the Star Wars Lego Minifigures. Some of them, like Darth Vader, had a sword-like weapon in his hand. This is how our conversation went:

Ben: Mommy I like his life saver.

Me: What life saver?

Ben: The one he has in his hand. He must be a bad guy, he has a life saver in his hand.

Me: That’s not a life saver. A life saver is a round candy with a hole in the middle. This sword-like weapon is called a Light Sabre.

Ben: …

Me: Can you say Light Sabre? It’s like a sword and they fight each other with it.

Ben: But I like calling it a life saver…

Ok then…

Another time we were walking home from school, just he and me, and he was telling me about a new word they learned in Kindergarten:

Ben: Today we learned what retirement means.

Me: What does retirement mean?

Ben: It means that a teacher doesn’t teach children anymore (referring to his teacher from last year who retired this year).

Me: Yes, that’s right. Mrs. B is no longer a teacher. She stopped working. She retired.

Ben: When teachers don’t teach anymore.

Me: But did you know it’s not just teachers that retire? Your Nonno and Grosmami have retired too. They don’t go to their work anymore, and they were not teachers.

Ben:(long pause)

Ben: I know what I’m going to retire from.

Me: What’s that?

Ben: I’m going to retire from talking to THAT SONJA!

Well if it were only that easy…


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