Babies babies everywhere…but not in this house

Remember long ago when you were childless and you wanted a baby?

There are so many newborns in this neighbourhood…

A childless person who wants a baby thinks about baby stuff. The gear and the love and the help coming from all directions and the cute little chubby feet and tiny toes…the first milestones of smiling, and recognizing someone…A childless person takes her grande latte with her to the ergonomic baby stroller store, wearing heels and jewellery and possibly a white top, not a hair out of place on a colour co-ordinated do on her head, and she will imagine how she will take that same trip, with latte in hand and carefully selected (and shopped for) clothing on her body, to the mall with her infant in tow while on mat leave…

And she should. She should do all that and enjoy it.

No one will tell her about how the infant will turn into a needy 4 year old who has 16 friends and wants to go to the park and demands frozen yogurt and pizza for lunch and will make annoying loud noises pretty much all the time. No one can explain, even if they want to, how something like hockey, which has never interested her in the slightest, will become her new topic of interest because her 6 year old has been picked for the select team to play in a Christmas tournament. Or how the endless running around grocery stores to buy nutritious, wholesome food for an active child with on-again-off-again picky eating habits will leave her sobbing into her wine glass at the witching hour.

But then a newborn shows up at the local pool during swim lessons and the little baby squeals of hunger release some sort of hormone into the brain and all of a sudden there’s a little pull in the nether-area…

Up until about 8 months or so I was still on the fence about having another one. But if my hormones are telling me anything, time is going to be running out at some point…so I test DH with little hints. I say stupid things like

It’ll probably be two girls and we’ll name them Abigail and Jasmine

I get looks from him. His looks could be described as horror, surprise, or exasperation, and are met with a healthy dose of eye-rolling.

His response is

You want another kid? What you want is a baby.


Cute little babies grow into mobile toddlers, and then into kids who have activity needs and money jars and rarely stop talking…

I digress.

With the second part of summer vacation coming to an end I cannot begin to imagine what it would be like for me to have a baby in the house again. A tiny, innocent baby that will interrupt my sleep and eventually grow into a moving, talking child. Another child who will want to join soccer, hockey, gymnastics, or art, music or pottery class…or have a special need…

I can’t do it. I’m too tired.


2 thoughts on “Babies babies everywhere…but not in this house

  1. So funny you write this!! As I considered momentarily, my quickly waining fertile future.
    I just waved a friend off, after spending the past two days cisitibg with her two grade school aged boys and 1 year old.
    I’m done. Nethers are dry. Bring on my mid-life latte!

  2. This is really attention-grabbing, You’re a very skilled blogger. I’ve joined
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